I Know How It Feels

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I have never felt so alone as I did when suffering with infertility. When I finally started talking to people about it, it was hard. Hard to hear someone say, “I know how it feels”. When really they didn’t. I found comfort talking to a friend also suffering. She really did understand. She knew the struggle, the negative pregnancy tests, the depression, the heartache and the loneliness  that filled my heart.

I praise God that I haven’t felt that way in a long time. He has turned my sadness into joy. Yet it is still hard to relate to other women. I am expecting but not pregnant. Adoption puts me in a different and interesting situation.

We went to the store to register for our baby showers. The man looked at me and asked me if the registry was for a wedding. No it’s a baby registry. He looked at me and then kind of shrugged to himself and handed me the scanner. I didn’t choose to educate him about my adoption at the time because he was busy.

No one can understand how I feel like another adoptive mother. It’s like I make an instant bond with someone when I hear they have adopted or are adopting. They know how I feel. It is such a relief. She knows the struggles of waiting, raising funds, saving and planning for the arrival. All with a joyful yet guarded heart.

I have been blessed to meet many adoptive mothers, a lot via social media. Their prayers and support are worth their weight in gold. When I feel frustrated during this process, I often turn to them. When something happens that seems like a miracle to me but other’s wouldn’t understand, they rejoice with me.

You may never know the loneliness of infertility or the many stages of adoption however no matter the circumstance it is always good to have someone who can truthfully say, “I know how you feel.”

Sometimes it isn’t always possible as our lives are so uniquely ours and our struggles often seem unbearable but know that the Lord will always listen. He hears your prayers and understands our weaknesses. He stands in the gap for us and will give us comfort at any time.

Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.

I Peter 5:7  Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.

If you are struggling with infertility or are going through the adoption process, I would love to talk to you. You are not alone.

Please feel free to email me at esther@everygoodthing.com

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