The cost of adoption is one thing that mentally stood in my way before we started this process. I looked at the amount of money we would need and thought there is no way that I could save/raise this much money. I heard so many people say that if the Lord brings you to it He will provide. But to be honest I knew that He could, but I doubted how He would do it.
We prayed that God would help us by providing some funds before we even signed the papers to start the process. He did! We received a generous gift of money and from then on I knew that God would provide for the child He had planned for us. This does not mean that I just sat back and said here is my bank account God, please deposit the money. Although the first money we received was a gift, I knew that often God’s provision is by giving us ideas of how to work to make extra money. After doing lots of research I decided to plan a huge garage sale. It was a lot of work and planning. The Lord’s hand was in it the whole time. It was amazing to me that so many people, some that didn’t even know me, would donate their stuff to us. I spent a lot of time at the storage unit place pricing and organizing. But the hard work paid off.
Jason was blessed to also receive bonuses 2 years in a row. These also would not have been given to him if not for his hard work and dedication at his job.
As we come to the last phase of the adoption process and some of the largest bills are coming due, it is so easy to get discouraged. I felt kind of queasy when I got the invoices we had to pay. But recently I started doing something which has really helped me deal with situations that get me upset. I allow myself about 10-15 minutes of being upset. I embrace the fact that I am troubled over something, then I turn it over to God. Sometimes people want to say you shouldn’t feel doubt, anger, disappointment, sadness or fear at all. That it is wrong to feel that way. I disagree. We are going to feel that way. It is our human nature and sometimes it is good to let it out. But we should not let those feelings consume or over take us. Don’t let them run the show. God is greater than all of those things. He can take the fear, sadness, doubt and anger and replace it with peace.
Joshua 1:9 “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
If you read the beginning of Joshua 1, you will see that Joshua has just been charged with leading the nation of Israel into the promised land. Moses had been the leader of Israel for more than 40 years and it would not be easy to step into his place. The fear and doubt that overcame Joshua was probably pretty strong. But God commanded him to be strong and to not be afraid.
This adoption is my promised land. There are so many times I have felt afraid, discouraged and unsure of what I should do. But the Lord promises that He will be with us wherever we go. So I am choosing to trust in Him.
You might have a car that is broken down, a medical bill that is pending, or you might be searching for what is best for your family in any number of situations. Those feelings are real and often upsetting but don’t let them overtake you, put your trust in the One who has the answers and will never leave you or forsake you. God is with you wherever you go.