Learning to be Brothers

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Whenever I hear the song “Brother” by NeedtoBreathe,

 I pray it will be how Mac feels about his brother Noah as he grows up.

” Brother, let me be your shelter
Never leave you all alone
I can be the one you call
When you’re low
Brother, let me be your fortress
When the night winds are driving on
Be the one to light the way
Bring you home”

Being brothers that don’t live together and don’t have the same parents offers more than a few challenges. However those challenges are something I strive to meet every day. One of the many reasons that Mac’s birth mom chose open adoption was because she wanted her sons to know each other and be friends. Her heart’s desire was for them to have a close relationship.

 When we agreed to an open adoption, we made a commitment to make sure they had every opportunity possible to build this type of relationship. We talk to Mac, who is  2 , about how Noah is his brother, just like his cousins Daniel and Nolan are brothers.  He sees him in pictures in our home and we talk about how when they were both tiny babies they were in his birth mom’s belly. Noah is parented by his grandparents and of course Mac was placed with us. We know this conversation will evolve as they get older but my focus is for both of them to know they are loved. We do love Noah. He is a sweet and precious boy. We make sure we tell him that when we see him. Likewise Mac’s grandparents, birth mom and uncle love him and show him that love when we are all together. It is important that our boys see that we love them. So they will know that this is how they should love each other.

They play together when we go over to Mimi and Papa’s house and we also try to have Noah come over to our house to visit too. It isn’t always easy they are 4 and 2 and those ages sharing is always tricky but when they greet each other with the proclamation “My brother is here!” it makes us all happy and feel like we are doing what we set out to do.


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