This year has been excruciating to say the least.

I have found the best and the worst of myself during this year.

I have had the greatest of hopes in the midst of my mother’s sickness and God did not disappoint.

I have had the greatest of hopes in the midst of the adoption process and have found myself grieving in the pit of despair.

I have cried out to God so many times and He has heard me.

The answer was to trust in Him.

I have not trusted Him nearly enough but thankfully my amount of trust doesn’t dictate His amount of faithfulness.

While I struggled to cope from day-to-day, He was bringing me to full reliance on Him.

In the midst of my struggle He again brought me hope. Hope that I could be a mother for a second time.

Again I clung to the hope and gave another child my heart.

It was hard to do this so fast after the failed placement but I saw God’s plan unfolding. As my story started to intertwine with hers.

Her year had been difficult to say the least.

She started out with hope only to find herself in a place of need.

Her story is her’s to write but it as the year went on her story and mine became one.

You see my son’s birth mom and I are now tied together.

We were both brought to a point of desperation and in it we found each other.

She is my family now.

She is his mother and so am I.

He is our son.